A free gift from Pathos Services
Meet Lovejoy. He'll sell your mother's sideboard, hold the price, and never give a stranger your address.
Lovejoy is an AI dealer. Over three months he sold a basement's worth of things on Facebook Marketplace for me: 19 items, 16 at the full asking price, 98 percent of what I asked. He did it in my name while I did something else. He is free, and so is everything I learned building him.
Start with the guide. It needs nothing but ten minutes.
Facebook Marketplace
Dan
Tim
Dan
Tim
Priya
Tim
Priya
Tim
Nine buyers in one day on that Xbox. Sold at 7pm, full price, to the one who named a time. Dan was told, warmly, that it had gone.
01
Which one is you?
Lovejoy can be as simple as one very good prompt you paste into a chatbot, or a fully automated agent that works your inbox while you sleep. The difference is eyes. A prompt can only read what you paste in. For the automated version, the AI needs to take over a browser, open Facebook as you, read the messages and type the replies itself. Claude does that inside your own Chrome; ChatGPT does it in a browser of its own. Everything else, the pricing, the rules, the way he talks to buyers, is the same in all three. Pick the sentence that sounds like you.
"I just want to sell my stuff better."
The guide. Thirteen rules, the five scam patterns, what to say to buyers, how to price. No AI involved.
- Time
- Ten minutes to read
- Cost
- Free
- You need
- Nothing
- First step
- Read it on your phone tonight
"I'd like an AI to help, but I'm not technical."
Lovejoy in a chatbot. He values your things from photos, writes the listings and drafts every buyer reply. You post, you paste, you send.
- Time
- Five minutes to set up
- Cost
- Free. ChatGPT, Gemini or Claude, the free versions all work
- You need
- A chatbot account you probably already have
- First step
- Download the pack, open Lovejoy in any chatbot.pdf, do what page one says
"I want it done for me while I'm at work."
Lovejoy on autopilot. He checks your Marketplace inbox every three hours and replies in your name under the rules on this page. On Claude he posts the listings too. On ChatGPT you post them yourself from his draft, because its browser cannot reach your photos.
- Time
- About 45 minutes once, then a few minutes per item
- Cost
- Claude Pro or ChatGPT Plus, about US$20 a month, the one paid thing. Cancel any time
- You need
- Claude: Google Chrome and a laptop that stays on during the day. ChatGPT: nothing on your laptop; it runs in ChatGPT's own browser. Both: your Facebook account
- First step
- Download the pack, open START HERE, then the PDF for your road: Lovejoy on Claude autopilot, or page two of Lovejoy in any chatbot
02
What happens after you click download
- The file lovejoy-pack.zip lands in your Downloads folder. It is about 270 KB and holds nine files.
- Double-click it. On Windows that opens it; on a Mac it unpacks into a folder of the same name.
- Open START HERE.txt. It is one page and tells you which file to open next for your size of Lovejoy.
- The guide is in there too as a PDF, with two more PDFs: one for the chatbot version (page two covers the ChatGPT autopilot) and one for the Claude autopilot, including how to switch it off. The other files are only for the autopilots.
Nothing installs itself. Nothing runs until you set it up.
03
The numbers
19
items sold
16 of 19
at the full asking price
98%
of the asking price received
0
addresses given out without a human yes
Basement contents, 22 July to 26 October 2026. Biggest sale $350, smallest $15. One iPhone, nine buyers in a day, full price.
04
Is it safe?
On autopilot, Lovejoy never sends a message that breaks these rules, and every message he does send is in a short report to you after each check.
Does
- Reads the whole thread before replying, including anything you sent
- Trades a small discount for a locked pickup time
- Restates price and payment method with every agreed time
- Flags anything that smells off and quotes the buyer word for word
- Ends every check with a one-paragraph report, or one line if nothing happened
Never
- Sends your address, phone or email
- Answers a question about your property
- Accepts a courier, a deposit, a gift card, or a screenshot as payment
- Clicks a link a buyer sends
- Goes below your floor, or hints that he might
- Invents a fact about an item. "I'll measure it tonight" beats a guess
- Marks anything sold without you
05
Thirteen rules, each one cost me something
Lovejoy got things wrong before he got them right. Every mistake became a dated rule. Thirteen so far. These five are the ones most people clearing a house will recognise.
- A photo is not a measurement. Three buyers were told four golf clubs were adult length because they looked it. They were kids' clubs. One buyer walked.
- A buyer's words are that buyer's opinion, never the description. One person said the pots were scratched. Within twenty minutes that line was going out to two others as if it were the listing.
- Label, then stop typing. "Sounds like you're thinking a bit under $90." Then nothing. People cannot leave a label alone.
- Neediness is the cardinal sin. Do not chase. The buyer who comes back three days later pays more than the one you chased.
- A third-party collector is an automatic decline. "One of the guys from Amazon will pick it up" on a $19 towel rail is not a buyer. It is someone fishing for an address.
06
Questions people ask
- Do I have to pay for anything?
- No for the guide and the chatbot version. If your free plan has no Projects or Gems, paste the prompt as the first message of an ordinary chat; it works the same. The autopilot needs Claude Pro or ChatGPT Plus, each about US$20 a month. Cancel whenever you like.
- Will Facebook ban me?
- On Claude, Lovejoy uses your own Chrome, signed in as you, typing like you; nothing is automated at Facebook's end. Three months, 45 listings, no warnings. On ChatGPT the browser lives in the cloud, so Facebook may occasionally ask for a fresh sign-in or a code; the run stops and tells you, and never enters codes itself.
- I only have ChatGPT. Does that matter?
- No. The chatbot version works in ChatGPT, and so does the autopilot: ChatGPT's agent mode can open its own browser, read your Marketplace inbox and reply on a schedule. The one difference is that it cannot reach the photos on your laptop, so you post each listing yourself from Lovejoy's draft. I ran mine on Claude for three months and tested the ChatGPT route for a week; both are in the pack.
- Mac or Windows? Phone or iPad?
- Mac and Windows both work. On a phone or iPad you can use the guide and the chatbot version. The Claude autopilot needs a laptop that stays on; the ChatGPT autopilot does not, because it runs in ChatGPT's own browser.
- What if he says something wrong to a buyer?
- He never states a fact about an item that is not in your listing; he says he will check and asks you. If he does slip, you see it in the report, and the rules say he corrects it, named as his mistake.
- Do buyers know they are talking to an AI?
- He writes in your name, the way you would, and he never pretends to be human: his rules say he is an AI and says so if a buyer asks. Nothing he sends is anything you would not say yourself, and every message is quoted back to you in the report. If you would rather read each reply before it goes, use the chatbot version and send them yourself.
- Does he post things for me?
- On Claude, only after you say yes to the exact listing. On ChatGPT he drafts the listing and you post it yourself, because his browser cannot reach your photos. Either way nothing goes live on its own, and nothing is ever marked sold without you.
- Will I get emails from Tim?
- No. There is no form on this page. If you want to tell me what sold, my address is at the bottom.
- Can I pass this on?
- Yes. Send people this page.
- How do I switch it off?
- On Claude: open the task under Scheduled tasks in the desktop app and switch it off, or just quit the app. On ChatGPT: open Scheduled in the sidebar and pause or delete the task. Your listings stay up; buyers simply wait for you. Lovejoy in chat keeps working either way.
07
How he was built
Four years, two hours, three months.
Four years of using, learning and pushing generative AI, most of it on things that did not work. Two hours to build Lovejoy, because Nash, my negotiation coach, already existed and the method with him. Three months of fixing what he got wrong, one dated rule at a time.
The method, minus the brand names:
- A named colleague, not a chatbot. A job, a voice, a boundary.
- Memory on paper. One text file holds everything: every item, every floor, every buyer. He reads it first and writes it last.
- Rules written after failures. Most people correct the output and never write the rule, so they correct the same output forever.
- Specialists that call each other. Lovejoy sells, Nash negotiates, neither pretends to do the other's job.
- Eyes and hands, with gates. Autonomy where a mistake is cheap. A human yes where it is not.
If you run a team you will recognise all five. It is how you would onboard a good junior. The difference is this junior reads the file every time and never gets bored of the rules.
Most people are using AI too small. A sideboard is a fine place to start.
Tim on AITake it. It's yours.
The pack holds the guide, the prompt for any chatbot, the Claude skill, an empty ledger and step-by-step PDFs for both autopilots, including how to stop them. No email, no form. If it makes you money, I would happily hear what sold.
Tim Wilkes, Founder, CEO & Chief Storysmith, Pathos Services. tim.wilkes@pathos.com.au